Spaceseed

As you might well be aware for some time now Count Robot has been scribing some of the words for Georgia, space metal prog rockers, Spaceseed.

Well in a bit of news, their new cd comes out soon with some of Count Robot’s ramblings on the disc.

I’m sure you expected that…

However what you didn’t expect is that we are already planning another Spaceseed release and this one will be more epic…

Writing and rambling away like mad.

A few of you may ask, hey how did you get on board that there Spaceseed ship Count Robot?

Well it happened like this…

Back in the days of anti-social media John Pack AKA JP High Overlord of Spaceseed and Commander of the Quill Back Momboloids and Count Robot got communicating online since they were going to be playing a festival together. The chattering ran into arranging a gig in Boston for Spaceseed. Then the chattering turned into meeting and more jibber jabber then JP asked Count Robot to contribute some words and that there is history.

So get on board the Spaceseed ship! All humans, and Non humanoids are welcome!

Yours in Spaceseed delight,

Count Robot

Pirate Tales

ARRRRRRRRRrrrrrrrrrrrrr!

Like a little pirate booty aye?

Well there friends, folks, and salty dogs check out Captain David’s Haunted Pirate Show.

Its full of ghastly spooky songs and tales.

A couple of the stories were woven by our own Count Robot so dig it like a grave.

Here’s a ghastly and brief interview between Count Robot and a ghost.

Ghost: When you work on these tales for Captain David are you interested in historical accuracy?

Count Robot: I know that the tales Captain David has written himself are very historically precise, however since so far I’ve only written for the Haunted show I decided to jettison reality and make up as much as I wanted. Fictional tales most often function best in a fictional world.

Ghost: Are you happy with the way Captain David tells the stories at his shows?

Count Robot: Very much so. Captain Fork Tongue really brings the stories to life and gives them a vibrancy that’s not on the page. When I wrote those stories I made sure to listen to Captain David’s voice in my head. If I couldn’t hear the line in his voice then I edited that line out.

Ghost: Will you be writing more stories for Captain David?

Count Robot: I would be happy to do so.

Here’s a clip of Captain David Fork Tongue’s Haunted Pirate Show

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=REZt2kya0h0

Yours in haunted sea shanties,

Count Robot

I Bleeding to Death

 

Blue magic marker

Window

This is where they were dying died dead

We’ve raised a garden of therapy stones

Did it make you feel so big

Did it make them all seem so small that they didn’t matter and you could do whatever you wanted because you had them right where you wanted them

How many times did I see this nightmare on TV

How many times did I listen to some other idiot pretend to understand and conceptualize this thing which burned through us like a hole where there’s a bullet still lodged

Someone wrote that, “I bleeding to death” in blue magic marker on a window

They weren’t talking to me or you they were dying

Many of the families of Columbine feel like its forgotten already

That’s easy for us to do, there’s no one to avenge ourselves on except ourselves so let’s move on

The monuments and the memorials are built so let’s move on to a window with blue magic marker

I bleeding to death

One victim wrote that

and died

yours in sadness,

Count Robot

Stephen Colbert is a pansy

You heard me right wimpburger, I am call you out! How dare you duck Rio Santos and his challenge to you?

I know there you are and your show with your intern slaves and Jimmy minions doing your bidding and you have your millions of fans but all the while you live in fear of the mighty power and powerful odors of the great and greatest masked super hero wrestler of all time, Rio Santos!

If you think you’re a man, and not an intern hording twonk bucket, you will face the power of Rio Santos on your show!

Rio Santos knows you are a bear in the form of a man and here is the video to prove it Stephen Coalbear!

Collective Minds

Ever wonder why sometimes there are similar albums, movies, and books that come out at the same time?

I do.

Sure some of it is, “Hey I heard that so and so is making a movie about a space blob that comes to Earth to eat all the jelly. That sounds like a hit. Lets make a movie about a space blob that comes to Earth to eat all the peanut butter.”

So yes, some of it is ride the bandwagon lets rip everyone off because we have no ideas of our own.

However some of it isn’t. So does it come down to coincidence? Perhaps.

Maybe there’s something else going on. Does humanity share a consciousness? If so is there a universal unconscious idea bank is it possible that we occasionally withdraw the same ideas at the same moment?

My thinking is yes we do.

Yours in shared thought,

Count Robot

A Rio Santos Adventure

Wherever there is evil, wherever injustice runs rampant, wherever foul villains perform their foul smelling deeds and as long as there are non mutant tacos to be eaten Rio Santos, will be there.

One morning while I was eating a cherry cheese burrito my trusty canine companion Chi Chi received a call on his cell phone telling us that Timmy was trapped down the well. I didn’t know of anyone by the name of Timmy but saving little boys sounds like the heroic thing to do. Besides children often have grateful attractive mothers. Or sometimes mothers who are skilled in the culinary arts. Occasionally I find both but that’s very rare.

Chi Chi and I raced to the well only to find there wasn’t a well so there was obviously no little boy that was waiting to be rescued. The whole thing had been a clever ruse used by my diabolical enemy, The Mutant Taco. He had lured me to that spot to trap me with his radioactive chili. Foolishly the Mutant Taco hadn’t counted on my astounding eating powers and I devoured his radioactive chili which was very tasty though strangely lacking in garlic.

Chi Chi and I quickly overpowered the Mutant Taco and turned him over to the authorities

That is how I Rio Santos saved the world for the first time that day.

Sincerely yours,

Rio Santos (The World’s Greatest Masked Super Hero Wrestler)

Projected Projects

Hello there space cadets and cats.

Just thought it was time for some timely news.

What’s going down around here?

Well the following projects are going on:

11. Spaceseed is unleashing a new cd called the Fraternal Order of Spaceseed. Count Robot wrote some of the words. Count Robot is already working on words for the next one…

22. Astro Al is one track away from releasing our new collection of tunes. Titles so far include; Steampunk and Old Steggito.

33. Count Robot plans to begin releasing a six part e book serial short story on Amazon.com this year.

And that’s what’s fit to print for now.

Busily yours,

Count Robot