Thursday, January 30, 2014

A True Science Fictional Lie

My friend Pudding Samson is a comedy/singer/songwriter.
She writes really funny and sharp material.
She sings well and plays solid guitar.
One night I ask her if she wants to do a gig with Astro Al. We’ve done them plenty of times before.
She blindsides me and says “No thanks, I’m not doing anymore gigs ever. Just going to be a studio thing.”
“That’s a mistake.”
“Why? Why should I bother? No one shows up. Ever. Why do you bother?”
“Now that is an interesting question. See you have to understand something. Doing these gigs is not about amassing an audience or sucking up the energy of performing for hundreds or thousands of people. Hell I don’t want to play any huge shows at all. I like small venues.”
“But what’s the point then?”
“Catch this vibe. You see as a performer and singer/songwriter you’re good. Your songs are catchy and funny and have a mellow message to them. I dig it. However they could be better, just like I know I can be better. How you get better is by pouring massive amounts of energy into practicing advertising promoting a gig then showing up and releasing all that energy into the ether of your performance. It is that surge and rush of emotion and creativity that will propel your material. You have to do that.”
“The Beatles stopped gigging and did their best work.”
“No offense Pudding but neither you nor I or are Lennon and McCartney. You’re good but not quite there and I’m more Larry Buchanan than Ed Wood. The Beatles were fantastic but call me crazy, I think if they had played some more gigs who knows how much better they could have been.”
“Ok let’s gig!”

Yours in self-indulgence,
Count Robot

PS for those who don’t know Larry Buchanan and Ed Wood here you go…

Friday, January 24, 2014

The Lost Transmission from the Moron Factory on Saturn

Beep Beep
Are you crazy?
Perhaps but no more than you
The trees shimmer vibrantly

In a cone there is no taste that should not belong hanging upside down with a bat on Venus

Did you ever see that flick Zontar thing from Venus? It was really It Conquered the World redone on cheap 16mm. But the thing is the original was cheap and cheesy enough but I guess not for some folks. The thing I love about Zontar (not the endless walking scenes) is how they kill Zontar with a wacky space weapon not just a blowtorch like in It Conquered the World.

Wait did you just call us to tell us that?
Ok I am pressing your self-destruct button. Enjoy.

Yours from somewhere in the south side of space,
Count Robot

Sunday, January 12, 2014

Count Robot’s 3 Favorite CDs of 2013

Lists, lists, of lists. Another year gone and once again it was a great one for tunes.
There certainly was a dearth of great tunes created this year. Ok so 2013 is in the rearview mirror. Much like 2012, 2013 was blessed with lots of fantastic new music releases. So here in reverse order are Count Robot’s favorite 3.

#3 Black Sabbath: 13
Wow! Doom filled riffs, crunching bass, and Stephen King worthy lyrics. Sabbath and Rick Rubin brought it all. Robot ghosts haunt and rock the graveyard with loners and acoustic guitars. A friend said he thought this is their best album and dude I agree. I may have an army of torch wielding villagers chasing me after this but they have never sounded so good, ever. Blues fueled dirge metal prog sung straight and carried by an undead figure. Awesome. It only took one listen to make the top 3. Is God dead? Only if God doesn’t own this record. I’ve heard the deluxe edition is even better. Must seek it out.

#2 Nik Turner: Space Gypsy
This is most likely Nik’s best solo CD… ok it is his best solo CD. This album totally caught me off guard. When I heard Mr. Turner had a new CD coming out I just assumed it would be a decent release I didn’t expect the jaw-dropping slab of exploding space rock that crashed through my speakers. There’s no fill. No drone ambient goes nowhere pre-fab wanking with space knobs. This is a sonic attack on the mind of space rockers. This is an explosive statement of what can be done with space rock and what it should blast off in search of. Moogs, mellotrons, sax, flute, and time crypts in the eternity of a time wind. Nik is blowing his wizard horn with full strength and intergalactic over drive. Dig his histrionically delivered paranoia laced vocal take on Something’s Not Right. Amazingly it’s a bonus track but it’s a top-notch tune.

#1 Steven Wilson: The Raven that Refused to Sing
This CD landed in January and right then it had the top spot. Kept waiting to see if some release could dethrone it but there was just nothing as sonically, cinematically, and artistically powerful.
This is a unique piece of work in so many ways. It’s not just a collection of tunes, it’s a volume of supernatural stories transformed into songs.
Luminol tells a ghost story in an amazing 70’s prog jam jazz explosion. This song blasts the doors off and its deft trickery and harmonies are neck snapping. This song says yes to yes and crowns the king of crimson.
The Watchmaker breathes Poe moods and the morose feeling of a failed life all in a spiraling melody.
Everything about this cries its greatness. Not a weak song or poorly played note exists here. The title track, The Raven that Refused to Sing, captures, joy, fear, love and death in a stirring majestic sweep of strings and grandeur.
Scrape my jaw up off the floor please.

Looking forward to more musical greatness in 2014. I hear Trance to the Sun will have an all-new album out…

Wednesday, January 1, 2014

please help out a werewolf


we absolutely adore the horror host show Shilling Shockers 

sadly one of the stars of the show, Garou, is battling cancer in real life.

if you can donate even just a few bucks to help with his medical expenses that would be groovy.

here's a link where you can donate.